this is not here.

Procrastination

2008-11-08T20:06:43Z

I'm supposed to be writing my part of a group report right now, but I'm not. Instead I'm telling myself that I should be writing blog entries more often, so that when I go back and read this thing in a few years to see what a ridiculous person I am I'll actually have something to read. At the moment, I have too many things in my head and none I'd feel comfortable disclosing. I'll save proper writing for when my brain is a little less chaotic. Instead, a One-Word-Answer meme I got from here:

Where is your mobile phone? Bedroom
Where is your significant other? Filming
Your hair colour? Blah
Your mother? Overworking
Your father? Lost
Your favourite thing? Dessert
Your dream last night? Hazy
Your dream goal? Happiness
The room you're in? Quiet
Your hobby? Sleep
Your fear? Driving
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Earning
Where were you last night? Busy
What you're not? Decisive
One of your wish-list items? Painting
Where you grew up? Chaos
The last thing you did? Sneeze
What are you wearing? Dress
Your TV? Off
Your pets? Snoozing
Your computer? Unreliable
Your mood? Comtemplative
Missing someone? Always
Your car? Unlikely
Something you're not wearing? Socks
Favourite shop? Many
Your summer? Hot
Love someone? Always
Your favourite colour? Blue
When is the last time you laughed? Yesterday
When is the last time you cried? Saturday

Thank God for President Obama!

2008-11-05T18:25:15Z

Since last night at 11 pm, I have been feeling RELIEF. And Florida is a Blue State now, which makes me so happy and proud. I should have gotten up and danced and yelled and just rejoiced like a fool, but apparently I'm not that kind of person anymore. I guess I'm ecstatic, but holding it in.

I hated very much the continued references to MLK, hope to God they are not at all prophetic, but would not be surprised considering the sentiments expressed by crowds at McCain/Palin rallies during the last few months. The man needs to be put in a bullet proof bubble.

ignoring the oscars

2008-02-25T02:25:50Z

I'm listening to this rather short mix, as I have been most of the day. While doing that I've been improving my vocabulary at freerice.com and window shopping here. ("MO BETTER Phatty Meat Burger" indeed.)

Maria (Korean Ver.) Singer / 김아중(Kim Ah-joong)

2008-02-16T00:30:25Z

I'm happy I found this!

I watched the movie this music video comes from (200 Pounds Beauty) on the plane on the way to Korea and liked it very much. Then I kept hearing the song in stores while I was there. (: I want to go back.

Somewhat related: whenever I hear the Wii menu music I'm reminded of Colin's apartment in Korea. The smell and everything. It's very strange, but not in a bad way.

Only good news

2008-02-05T04:37:50Z

Ah, the beginning of another semester. I was all worried about how I'd do last semester and it was all for nothing. I got 3 A's and 2 B's. This semester I'm taking only 3 classes and things are not going well so far. I can turn it around though.

I have no idea what I've been doing with my time. Days just kind of disappear on me. Today, however, I know exactly what happened to the hours: I was online all day. The links that follow are the ones that made me happy.

1)My Grandma in CA is named Margaret, and giraffes are her favorite animals. This one's for her.

2)I am not a big fan of birds, but this guy is awesome.

3)The song Hey Ya is a bit depressing for me, but how could I resist a Ukelele Orchestra version of it? (+ Bret from Flight of the Conchords is in the orchestra. <3 )

4)Om Nom Nom Nom... I love Cookie Monster, too.

5)There's a guy who has a band named Twink the Toy Piano Band... How cute is that? (pixietwink approves.)

6)iheartguts has warm fuzzies that are pretty odd. A heart for Valentine's Day? Or lungs? That would be unexpected.

7)This lady's little felt bugs are cute, but the gnome family set is supercute.

8)Hello kitty lucky horse bento lunch? Yes, please!

9)Pac man cupcakes? I'll have those too.

10)I would wear an "If heaven doesn't have cupcakes I'm not going" shirt.

Other than that... um... Kerry came up for the weekend, so that was nice. And yesterday was Colin and my 3 year anniversary.

nebulablue @ 2007-08-29T19:05:00

2007-08-29T23:54:02Z

I'm back in Tallahassee. I'm taking 5 classes at TCC, 3 of which are math-based. (Yes, I can say "asking for a nervous breakdown," thank you very much.) So far, so good. I will probably be spending a lot of time in the math lab. Once this semester is over I should be able to go back to FSU. *fingers crossed*

My apartment is... ok. It's closer to a bus stop than my previous apartment had been. Colin's apartment is in the complex right next to mine, so that's nice. A big plus is that I have no roommates... unless you count the dog.

I was worried how little Jack would adjust to the move, but he doesn't seem to care at all. He had been behaving fabulously the first few days, but now that he's settled, he's back to barking at everyone who happens to be around when we're out walking. I need to do something about this. Also, this morning the maintenance guy came by... while he was standing outside the door, Jack was ok with him, but as soon as he crossed the threshold my sweet little mutt went BERSERK. O_O All I need is for him to bite somebody. (Cesar Milan, where are you?)

Another little problem I have right now is money. I'm waiting for financial aid monies to be disbursed. After that happens I can breathe. Having only $40 for the next three weeks is a bit disconcerting, but shouldn't really be a problem.

Meanwhile, Rose is due any day now. I can't wait to meet the baby!

Alright... I should stop procrastinating. I have homework to do.

nebulablue @ 2007-07-29T12:15:00

2007-07-29T17:14:25Z

3 weeks since I've posted, eh? Well, I guess it's been a fairly eventful 3 weeks.

Colin got back from Korea. Yay! He came by and watched some of the Live Earth concert with me. Later that day Uncle Mike and his crew came over to stay the night. Next day Colin and I saw Transformers with his parents. I was skeptical going in, but I liked it. I got a message from Bobbi on MySpace that she and her kiddies were in town so I gave her a call. It turned out Joe was driving down from port in Cape Canaveral so we all met for lunch at Tony Romas, Colin too. So I got to meet little Alice and Ben finally, and Colin got to meet Bobbi and Joe. They're all adorable. The first thing Alice said to me was "I got to ride the Teacups with Alice and Mad Hatter!" (: They had all just been to Disney World. After lunch, Joe took the kids and Bobbi's sister back home and Bobbi went with Colin and I to Sunset Place. I miss Bobbi. The Saturday after that Joe's parents had a big barbeque/ party at the clubhouse where they live and a whole lot of people were there. I got to give Jason the panda he requested from my trip to Asia. I think he was happy with it, despite it being just a cell phone charm. After the party, Colin picked me up and we went to see Eagle vs. Shark... odd little movie, but watchable enough.

A few days after that Colin and I drove up to Gainsville to visit Kerry, which was nice, and to Tallahassee for Colin to find an apartment. His parents went in their own car and brought their dog along, which was cute. Colin got an apartment very quickly, and I finally got things straightened out with TCC. :cue fanfare: I am now registered for classes. The previous problem with Financial Aid has mysteriously reappeared though so I will be calling tomorrow to sort that out (again). Then I'll have some money and I can get an apartment. I know just the one I want... even though it's pretty expensive. Anyway, after Colin's parents headed back home, Colin and I stayed with (enormously pregnant) Rose and her fiancee for a night. Despite being really tired, we went to a barbeque at Uncle Mike's girlfriend's house for dinner. I'm pretty sure a good time was had by all. Next day we went to Monica's place for lunch with Rose and Aunt Terry. That was nice too. They are so cute. We left directly from Monica's to Disney World. (!!) A lot has changed there since I was a kid, but I was glad to see they reopened the Carousel of Progress, even if it is different. I was not particularly fond of the changes made to Pirates of the Caribbean, but it grew on me after the second go- around. Anyway, we were there for three days and visited all the parks. I had lots of fun and I hope I didn't ruin it for Colin with my limping around. (The first night of hurting feet I blamed on my shoes, but the rest of the time my right foot hurt because something in it popped. Still dunno what did it or what exactly popped, but it's still slightly swollen and a funny faded-bruise color on one side. It's the one that got rolled on by a car years ago though, so that might explain something. It doesn't hurt so much now though so I'm not worried.)

While I was off riding around Florida with Colin, my copy of the last Harry Potter arrived at home. Adrian read it first and now I'm working on it. (: Haven't gotten enthralled with it as I did with the previous six, but I blame that on having many other things to be preoccupied with at the moment. I'm going to go eat something and then read for the rest of the day, I think.

S.O.S. Live Earth: July 7, 2007

2007-07-02T15:06:30Z

I've been all excited about this for a month and now realize that I haven't really said a thing to anyone about it. Concert + environmental activism = YES! It will be on TV, but since the Miami Science Museum will be screening it in the planetarium and having little demonstrations all day, I'd LOVE to go to that. The London lineup looks amazing. New York's is ok. Rip Slyme in Kyoto is pretty cool. (Lineup/ schedule info is here.)

That is all. Now back to your regularly scheduled blog reading. (:

nebulablue @ 2007-06-09T07:53:00

2007-06-09T12:33:03Z

Haven't had it in me to write anything about my travels. (Well, I did write something and didn't like it so I deleted it.) This past month has been stressful and depressing so I don't feel like chronicling much of anything. Really the worst of it has been this week.

What it comes down to is that I need to get out of here and every step I've taken to do so has been met with some kind of problem. I've done all I can to be proactive and deal with whatever problem arises without bothering (i.e. talking to) anyone else about any of it, and for the most part I've just been a bit frustrated and avoided getting too down about anything. The only person I've confided my frustrations to is Colin, and he seems to think I've done my best and any complaint I've voiced is understandable. So I feel pretty ok about how I've dealt. I'm sure he'd tell me if I were being an idiot or over-dramatic or whatever. Thank God for Colin.

Right now my whole problem lies with the stupidity of one woman, and that woman isn't me. It being Saturday, there's nothing I can do about this latest problem for two more days. Two days of little sleep and probably lots of grouch. Doesn't help that my mother can't speak to me without putting me down. I need no further reminder of what a loser I am and to what degree, but Mom seems to think otherwise, so I'm going to stay holed up in my room, for the good of everyone in the house. I don't have it in me, in my frustrated and sleep-deprived state, to shrug off or be civil through another unsubtle passive-aggressive assault. I've talked to Mom before about how she speaks to me and she doesn't think she says anything amiss. I talked to my brother about it and he says it's not just me, he's noticed it too. She still has no clue that she's being passive-aggressive and has the idea that if she is, then she's perfectly justified in being so and therefore has no reason to change or apologize for it. She's always been a little bit like that but it's been worse since she hit her 40s. Ah, mid-life. Fun for everyone.

Around the world, around the world...

2007-05-09T19:40:33Z

Hi there! I am still alive. (: I was just in another hemisphere for awhile.

I got back from my 68 day visit to Asia on Sunday (May 6) at Ridiculously Late O'clock, a.k.a. Almost Monday. What a harrowing 20+ hours... But I'm here in one piece (which is more than can be said for my luggage *sigh*) and that's what's important. I have also learned a few things. For example, I now know that I never want to go to LAX for any reason ever again, that KFC in Korea is evil, and that my immune system hates me.

I don't really know where to begin writing about the whole trip. I went lots of places and saw so many things and had some weird little experiences... There were so many things I wish I had taken pictures of... mostly the engrish signs. Everyone knows how much I love engrish. One of my personal favorite examples is the "On Your Face Style" store, in Seohyeon, I believe. (Any guesses as to what they might be selling? Yes? No? Well, it's an eyewear boutique. Makes sense now, doesn't it? Would also make sense if they sold cosmetics.) Second to that would be the sign for a small mall we passed on the way to Namdaemun. It had a name that I don't remember, but under the name were the words "Ubiquitous Mall". If you have any clue what that might mean, please explain it to me. I did get a picture of a sign in Tokyo, though, for a store called Pink Wood. And it wasn't a sex shop.

Wow. I'm tired like no one's business, even though it's only 2:30 pm here. Dunno if it's because I'm still jet-lagged or if it's the cold/allergy/god-knows-what thing which I'm guessing I caught on one of the planes. The worst of it seems to be over, thank goodness. It resembled an ear/sinus/throat infection at first. (My voice is still all croaky.) Anyway, I'll write about Asia either later tonight, after I've napped, or tomorrow.

Oh yeah. My accomplishments for today, so far: made pumpkin bread/muffins this morning, uploaded some travel pics to myspace and sorted them into two very concise albums, and put a flea collar on poor little Jack. I also caught myself up on blogs... and shopping sites. I need new clothes. :p

Because Jeni did it

2007-01-04T10:37:34Z

1. Put your ipod or mp3 on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to each question.
4. NO CHEATING.

1. How am I feeling today?
Shuffle says: I Wanna Be Sedated - The Ramones (; Off to a good start.

2. Where will I get married?
Shuffle says: This World - Zero 7 (um... Thanks for narrowing it down, mp3 player.)

3. What is my best friend's theme song?
Shuffle says: A Minor Incident by Badly Drawn Boy

4. What was high school like?
Shuffle says: Land of Confusion - Genesis (Whoa! I couldn't have picked better myself.)

5.What is the best thing about me?
Shuffle says: Kung Fu - Ash (What?)

6. How is today going to be?
Shuffle says: Sir Prize - The Starlight Mints O_o

7. What is in store for this weekend?
Shuffle says: Yesterday - The Beatles (Like Groundhog Day? AAAHHHH!)

8. What song describes my parents?
Shuffle says: Blister by Jimmy Eat World

9. How is my life going?
Shuffle says: Auntie's Municipal Court - The Monkees (I don't understand the song either.)

10. What song will they play at my funeral?
Shuffle says: Red Alert by Basement Jaxx (yep... right before twanging me into a tree. (; )

11. How does the world see me?
Shuffle says: How Soon Is Now? - The Smiths (eh? Dada?)

12. What do my friends really think of me?
Shuffle says: What's the Dillio? - Mest (haha!)

13. Do people secretly lust after me?
Shuffle says: Manic Monday - The Bangles (ok. only on Mondays. got it.)

14. How can I make myself happy?
Shuffle says: Caring is Creepy - the Shins

15. What should I do with my life?
Shuffle says: Spin Spin Sugar- Sneaker Pimps (make cotton candy?)

16. Will I ever have children?
Shuffle says: Year of The Rat - Badly Drawn Boy (O_O when is that?)

17. What is some good advice?
Shuffle says: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun- Cindy Lauper (LOL)

18. What do I think my current theme song is?
Shuffle says: It's Not A Fashion Statement, It's A Fucking Deathwish by My Chemical Romance (alarming.)

19. What does everyone else think about my current life?
Shuffle says: Snowshoe BBQ - Atom and His Package (??)

20. What type of women/men do you like?
Shuffle says: Lust For Life - Iggy Pop

21. Will you get married?
Shuffle says: Split - Ben Kweller w/ Ben Lee (wow. bleak.)

22. What should I do with my love life?
Shuffle says: Maxwell's Silver Hammer - The Beatles (BWAHA! horrible!)

23. Where will you live?
Shuffle says: Like a Virgin - Madonna (get me to a nunnery?)

24. What will your dying words be?
Shuffle says: I'm Dying Tomorrow- Alkaline Trio (LOL so i'll be wrong.)

25. When I'm having sex, I say...
Shuffle says: We'll Never Sleep (God Knows We'll Try) - Rilo Kiley (;

26. When I meet a guy/girl for the first time I say...
Shuffle says: No No No - the Yeah Yeah Yeahs (um... only if i meet them on a Monday, right?)

27. When my parents are angry I say...
Shuffle says: Do You Wanna Dance? - The Ramones (hehe that would go over well.)

Not bad. (:

Why the hell am I still awake?

laleela

2006-12-15T05:42:36Z

I've been slowly working on stuff to sell on etsy. It's been slow because I've been feeling pretty awful lately. At any rate, a few things have been knitted and/or sewn. Now I need to get decent pictures of them. I'll probably have to borrow Mom's camera for that. Meanwhile there are some not so good pictures on my flickr thingy of 3 of my finished products.

Oh, and a picture of the cupcakes I made today. Only made a dozen since I only have 2, 6 cup pans. I was feeling pretty yucky (even baking wasn't enjoyable) and since I couldn't find the right size cake pan, I poured the rest of the batter into a foil-lined loaf pan instead of waiting to do another batch of a dozen cupcakes. Hooray for foil! No scrubbing of bakeware necessary! Hooray for boxed cake mix and pre-fab frosting! Ah, the lazy baker's best friends. Also, I love those little star sprinkles. (:

Mom hasn't said for certain yet whether she is or isn't, but she might be heading back to Atlanta to take care of Aunt Kitsy again for awhile. Since Dad and Adrian are going to Puerto Rico for Christmas and New Year's, if Mom goes to Atlanta it'll be just me and the pets here for the holidays. So that'll be... different. Mom has been saying she wants to ignore Christmas this year, so maybe she actually will. If she leaves, I'll decorate the house myself. :p I'm not a Christmas Curmudgeon yet! I might make a button wreath, even though Mom's comment about it was "what a waste of vintage buttons."

I really like theblackapple's Christmas tree... particularly her unusual topper. :) The gifts look very nice too. I love seeing other people's decorations.

There were other things I've been thinking of writing, but now I'm all tired and crampy and gross and stuff. Tomorrow maybe.

Quarter of a century

2006-12-04T07:58:04Z

As of 5:19 am Sunday morning, I am 25 years old. Feels about the same as 24, but somehow sadder. Started out kinda badly, since the neighbors were having a loud party Saturday night that lasted into the wee hours of the morning, preventing any kind of sleep from happening. Same damn people I called the cops on last year. Also, I forgot the pot pie I ate for dinner had cream in it, so yeah... angry, angry tummy. I did have a very good day, however, after I got some sleep. Mom and I went to Fujiya for a very late lunch/ early dinner. MMMMMMM... Honey-miso dressing on crisp salad, teriyaki fish, vegetable tempura, sashimi... *drool* My appetite has been nearly non-existent the past week, but I managed to eat almost everything. Then we went shopping because that's what Mom and I do when we're not home. Seemed like everything was on sale too. Didn't pay more than $10 for anything, not even at Macy's. Yay! And after shopping we went to the supermarket and picked up a cake, and some ice cream stuff. Any day that ends with chocolate cake is good. (:

And I was able to be out and about for multiple hours! I did feel bad by the time we got home, but I'm not counting that. So I guess I can get a job again as long as it's only about 4 or 5 hours/day and I can sit for at least 30 to 45 minutes at some point during that time. 'Tis the season for part time jobs?

I know it's silly but my new pajamas make me smile. I want to wear them all the time. (:

nebulablue @ 2006-11-27T20:43:00

2006-11-27T20:43:49Z

Thanksgiving this year was a relaxed affair... more like a regular dinner that took far too long to prepare. No extended family and no Dad. It was nice just being Mom, Adrian and I because we cooked, we ate, we sort of cleaned up and that was it. No big to do with 16 other people in the house. No dressing up only to spill turkey juice on oneself after ten minutes of even being dressed up because somebody bumped your elbow while they were serving the thing next to you... We did miss the family a little and lots of the usual foods which they bring and we don't know how to make. There were a few new foods so that was nice. One of my new offerings was sweet potato casserole, which is apparently too sweet for anyone but me to eat. And another was Colin's Mom's Sickly-sweet Salad, which Mom and I love and Adrian refused to try.

Dad was only absent from the Thanksgiving proceedings because he was in the hospital yet again. He had slipped down the stairs, for the third time in less than 2 months, about 4 days earlier and gotten a cut on his elbow, which he kept bumping and re-opening and didn't put antibiotic ointment and gauze over like the rest of us suggested several times. Finally on the day before Thanksgiving his elbow had swollen to about twice it's natural size and was hot and pink... and he kept bumping it... so after making a big deal about it to me all day, and my snarky responses of "honestly, dad, are you really that stupid? you know your elbow is there, right? just watch what you're doing. it's not that difficult." and "yes, i see it's big. It's obviously infected so go to the hospital already." And after getting no sympathy from Mom either, who exaspiratedly said basically the same things I did, Dad finally went to the E.R. some time after midnight. He tried unsuccessfully to guilt mom into driving him, after she'd already gotten ready for bed. So he left in a bit of a huff, not having gotten his way or a big pity party or anything. Anyway, he also fainted while he was waiting in triage so they made him stay over night. He hadn't eaten all day, and he didn't learn his lesson from the last time he hadn't eaten all day and the same thing happened. *eye roll* The doctors have done a bunch of tests to make sure the fainting wasn't caused by something else. And of course the one who has to literally pay for all this idiocy is Mom. So! Antibiotics haven't worked for him at all so it's MRSA and that's horrifying... Not just because if the infection has gotten into his bone marrow he could have to have his arm amputated or because he could develop septicemia, but because it's HIGHLY contagious and he touched things AND ME all day long. (Yes, I am more worried about myself and my crappy immune system. He had plenty of chances to prevent infection, but he chose to be stupid.) So result is he's still in the hospital 4 days later and he will have surgery tomorrow to drain the fluid in his elbow and the doctors will poke around to see if there is anything more to worry about in there.

Mom went to visit him on Friday at his request and to take him some leftover Thanksgiving foods. I told her not to as he'd get the wrong idea. She went anyway, and of course he did get the wrong idea. He also complained about Adrian and I not going to visit him. When he gets back he will either make a big thing about how I didn't go see him and I'll have to be the one to explain to him about his 'poor little me' crap being enfuriating, or he'll give me the silent treatment which, as anyone who has met him would agree, would be a blessing. At any rate, on Saturday when Adrian needed Dad's car to get to work, he and Mom went to get it from the hospital and it was only fair that they go say hi to him and let him know that his car would no longer be sitting there. Dad made his big show for the nurse "Oh, my son! He came to see me! How are you?" Adrian gave him a kiss on the cheek and his usual short response. Dad then proceeded to talk to Mom non-stop for about 15 minutes, and since Adrian was just standing there Adrian said bye and left for work. Later Dad said "I guess all Adrian wanted was the car, huh?" And proceeded to try to get Mom to hug him and tried to kiss her and after being rubuffed several times he angrily asked her why she hadn't served him with divorce papers yet if she hadn't changed her mind. So she had to explain to him that there are lots of financial papers and things that the lawyer needs and she hasn't had time to finish futzing with all that since she works so much... so of course he got all mad and the visit ended with him saying "Fine. I'll find someone else who'll take care of me... You won't find another man who'll love you like I do. I only hope you won't regret losing me later." Talk about deluded! I've been trying to like him, really I have. But I just don't. He has the most extraordinary ideas of what a great man he is. *gag* And the one stuck at home with him, I have just listened to him and tried against every fiber of my being not to laugh at him outright and/or tell him the truth about himself because it would only be more trouble for Mom... but I don't know how much longer I can hold up. Mom's afraid he'll kill himself if anyone says anything else he doesn't want to hear, but I don't think so. He loves himself far too much for that now.

In other news, I'll be making little stuffed animal thingies and other assorted stuffs with the intention of putting them on etsy. I like what I have so far... I hope other people do. I really hope I can price things so that I make some money, but don't feel like I'm charging too much. I've been looking at what other folks are charging for similar items and I'm a little scared. :/ Shipping for the holidays will be... interesting. It's probably a little too late for that, but we'll see.

And now I have cloth to iron and patterns to transfer and SO MUCH hand-sewing to do.

I also have Japan stuff to print out so I can organize and plan things properly. And papers to get sorted to update the passport. And... well, lots of things.

Anyway... To work!

Caveat Voter

2006-11-07T17:59:58Z

This is taken from an email I got from democrats.com on Sunday:

"...media reports pour in documenting all kinds of incompetence and fraud (collected by BradBlog.com)

-a yellow button on the back of the Sequoia voting machine used in 16 states and Washington, D.C. that lets voters cast as many votes as they want.
-Venezuelan nationals at polling places "fixing" Sequoia machines (Chicago)
-vote-flipping on touch screens (Florida, South Carolina, Texas)
-voting machines not adjusted for daylight savings time that will shut down an hour before voting ends (Cleveland)
-candidates' names chopped short (Virginia, Texas)
-electronic voting cards disappearing (Memphis)
-Republicans paying lawyers to harass voters without photo ID's (Pennsylvania)

...

As of Saturday, pre-election polls predict Democratic gains of 18-45 seats in the House and 3-6 seats in the Senate, with some of these polls extremely close.

Incredibly, Republicans plan to scream "election fraud" if these pre-election polls prove true. As we all know, Republicans have run the country since they stole the 2000 election. And they only made voting worse by appointing corrupt election administrators like Katherine Harris and Ken Blackwell, and by bribing counties to buy fraud-prone electronic systems through HAVA. Yet these same Republicans plan to scream "election fraud" when they get clobbered on Tuesday to challenge legitimate Democratic victories in key races. That makes it essential to study pre-election polls to rebut Republican charges.

...

Karl Rove has been bragging for weeks about his "72-hour program" to swing the elections, which predict a Democratic takeover of Congress.

Now we know what it is: a dirty trick campaign using robocalls.

The calls are made to Democrats and swing voters at all times of day or night to make them angry. And they pretend to be from the Democrat ("Hello, I'm calling with information about Lois Murphy"). If you hang up, they call back 7-8 times, and each time you hear the Democrat's name, to get you angry at him or her. If you stay on, you get to hear a scathing attack on the Democrat.

Karl Rove's whole career has been devoted to dirty tricks. In 2002, his dirty trick was to force Congress to vote shortly before Election Day for the Iraq War based on two months of White House lies about WMD's and Al Qaeda ties. That dirty trick has cost the lives of 2,834 brave young Americans (16 so far in November), $2 trillion in debt to our children and grandchildren, and unleashed massive bloodshed in Iraq.

It's too late for legal action or even newspaper stories. If you receive one of these calls, write down the time and candidate and call every radio and TV show you can and urge everyone listening to vote against the disgusting Republican dirty tricksters. And forward this email to everyone you know so they aren't fooled by Karl Rove's dirty trick.

Let's make this Karl Rove's LAST campaign by voting ALL Republicans out of office."

More details:
http://www.talkingpointsmemo.com
http://dailykos.com

*shrug* Take that info however you wish. Obviously, it's very partisan... which doesn't keep it from probably being true. (I haven't bothered with all the links which were in the above quote. They're easy enough to find if you go to the sites that are mentioned.)

I can vote in Tallahassee, which does me no good being in Homestead. *sigh* The paperwork; the mailing. (I think I mentioned that before.) I will be able to vote here for the Presidential election though; by which time I might very well be back in Tallahassee. *grumble*

I have done my best to pass on my info to Mom, who is voting today and doesn't pay much attention to current events. (For example: she had no idea who Karl Rove is until I explained it to her last night. *eye roll*) Not that it really matters here in Florida. I mean... Katharine Harris is running for Senate. It's such a joke, yet it is really happening.

Actually, that last sentence pretty much sums up my feelings about the last 6 years.

The smear campaigning that's been going on here is completely disgusting. In 3 hours of TV watching I saw 6 Republican propaganda commercials (blatant mud-slinging) and only 1 commercial for a Democrat defending himself. That's how Florida TV stations are... and it also probably has to do with how much more money Republican candidates have for commercials versus grassroots Democrats/etcetera here. *sigh* As far as robocalls go, I don't ever answer the house line, so I wouldn't know... I don't answer my cell phone very often either, come to that.

Anyway, I thought this was appropriate for today:

You Are 55% American

Most times you are proud to be an American.
Though sometimes the good ole US of A makes you cringe.
Still, you know there's no place better suited to be your home.
You love your freedom and no one's going to take it away from you!

How American Are You?

"Sometimes the good ole US of A makes you cringe." That's an understatement.

One of the things that made me cringe? The phrase "Freedom Fries."

You Belong in Paris

You enjoy all that life has to offer, and you can appreciate the fine tastes and sites of Paris.
You're the perfect person to wander the streets of Paris aimlessly, enjoying architecture and a crepe.

What European City Do You Belong In?

Vive la France! (;

Endorphins included

2006-10-30T20:30:37Z

Plenty to write about, but nothing I want to share.

Instead... I dare you not to be cheered up, even just a tiny bit, by this: The Grates - Science is Golden. (No, it doesn't make sense.)

If that doesn't work, try a corgi puppy.

Even I couldn't stay gloomy.

I've reappeared.

2006-10-21T20:22:31Z

Went to the doctor yesterday and it seems the new pills are working well now. Yay! Side effects were no fun, but for the most part they're gone now. Yay to that too! I've been having chest pains, but it turns out they're not related; it's my lungs instead. Inflammation of the pleura. So I did get Dad's flu thing, but not in the same way he did. I just have to wait it out. Anyway, I'm glad I'm almost semi-normal.

After the doctor visit, Dad and I went to see The Prestige. Good movie. Impressive cast. Good performances all around.

Yes, I ended up hanging out with my Dad yesterday. As Dad outings go it was pretty decent. Mom is in Atlanta for a couple more weeks with Aunt Kitsy, so Dad and I are doing what Mom and I would usually be doing. Oh yeah. I didn't post about that... Kitsy has cervical cancer. She's been ill enough that she couldn't really take care of herself so Mom went to take care of her. Mom will be back Nov. 5. Hopefully Aunt Kitsy will be ok enough by then (meaning she won't need chemo) and it'll be ok for her to be on her own again. Fingers crossed.

What have I been up to... I've drawn more sort-of patterns for appliques which I have yet to cut out and sew. I baked pumpkin bread a couple days ago. It's so sweet it's more like cake really. So yummy. Adrian even bought whipped cream to put on it. Unfortunately it's still so humid in the house, and the pumpkin makes it so moist, that the bread is all soggy unless it's toasted. I keep expecting to find it moldy already. Adrian and I (mostly I) have been eating so much of it that there's only 1/4 left. Way back on Sept. 28, I baked a Lemon cake to celebrate Colin's Birthday. Just because he's not here doesn't mean I shouldn't celebrate. Besides, it was an excuse for eating cake. I would not be me if I passed that up. I'm considering the same thing for Mom's Birthday on Wednesday. I wonder if she and Kitsy will do something or if they'll forget? I'll have to call and remind them.

Other than baking and not- sewing, I've been either playing video games, puttering around online, or (horror of horrors) watching TV. Thank goodness for MASH and Star Trek: TNG reruns, downloaded Poirot, and Project Runway. And I'm in love with Ugly Betty... which means it will be canceled any day now.

While I was flipping channels at some ridiculous hour the other day, I came across this music video. I immediately searched youtube so I could share the craziness with Colin. I've had that tab open ever since. Damn catchy song!

I've had a bunch of other tabs open for a few days too. Just stuff I thought was interesting.

Keeping Up Appearances, Are You Being Served?, and Poirot paper dolls. Heehee!

Iggy Pop's concert rider. Quite funny. (It was linked here. (: Lovelovelove.)

When there's some money for such things, I'm getting this stuff in Creamsicle. Smells (and tastes O_o) so yummy.

The existence of a Mister Rogers quote bracelet makes me happy. The price is crazy though.

Another white dress thing. Looks like Victorian underwear. (:

Cute little navy and plaid dress.

Lovely handmade wooden dolls.

Chocolate sachets. Cute.

I'm such a window shopper.

Ok. I should go do something.

nebulablue @ 2006-09-19T10:38:00

2006-09-19T14:51:08Z

Innocent man sent to Syria and tortured.

Send a letter to your Senator asking them to do the right thing regarding Bush's laws which blatantly disregard human rights.

broken hearts are expensive

2006-09-19T06:11:12Z

Link of zen comes first today... because the rest of this is boring.

And this is pretty weird/funny.

And I have to link to this security analysis of the Diebold Accuvote-TS voting machine.

And sirenz' post here actually made me laugh because I had just watched Enemy of the State (which filled me with glee to see on TV) and thought "That could happen now..." But yeah, I am also disturbed and infuriated by this new attempt by the neo-Fascists to throw out more of our rights/ ignore the Constitution.

So... now for the boring stuff: Friday I went to see a new doctor, Dr. Haddad. He and his staff really seem to know what they're doing, in direct contrast to the previous doctor and his staff. Dr. Haddad said that the drug the previous doctor put me on commonly makes the condition I have worse. He also said it's unnecessary to do a tilt test every month. (Thank God!) He prescribed another beta-blocker, one that has actually worked for other people with my condition, which only cost $6.95. So I started taking that Friday night with all kinds of hope that it would work, and at 4:30 a.m. Saturday I woke up feeling awful. The awfulness continued all weekend. Yesterday evening I finally gave up hope of eventually feeling better on my own and called the doctor's answering service. The first call ended with me hanging up and proclaiming the woman on the other end of the line a "pompous bitch"... and that was the nicest term I came up with. She made me THAT angry. So my mom called and made the woman contact whichever doctor was listed as being on call. Dr. Haddad's assistant, Renee, called me back within an hour. She told me to stop taking the pills and come in this morning. So I did that and now I get to take a superexpensive vasodepressor. It costs $150.00 *gaspchokecough* for one month of pills, and that's with insurance. Doctor suspects I might have a type of arrhythmia called Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS), so I get to wear an event monitor for awhile. With any luck I won't have to wear it the full 4 weeks. If it turns out that I do have POTS, the pill I'm taking now is also used to treat that, so I'd have no new pills or side effects to deal with. Lucky, eh? :p

I'm still weak and shaking like I drank a whole pot of coffee, I now have a headache which I can't take anything for without asking the doctor or a pharmacist about first because of the medicine, my head feels all... full, and my skin feels like it's shrinking... so hopefully things will be better tomorrow. (My mom thought I was crazy when I said my scalp felt like it was too small for my head. Then I went and read the list of possible side effects on the Walgreens thingy, and lo and behold, itching/tingling scalp is listed. Very weird.)

I'm a citizen of hateful places.

2006-09-07T15:59:14Z

So I was looking up info on renewal of my Venzuelan passport, just in case I could stay in Korea longer with it than with my US one (which I just found out I can't anyway), and I came across this article from November 2003.

"Already facing allegations that Muslim extremists have obtained Venezuelan identity documents, President Hugo Chávez has put the country's passport agency in the hands of two radicals -- one a supporter of Saddam Hussein.

Hugo Cabezas and Tareck el Aissami were appointed last month as director and deputy director of the Identification and Immigration Directorate, in charge of border controls and issuing passports and national ID cards. The agency also works with electoral authorities on voter registration."

Hmm... something very wrong there. Bush Admin. is so keen to be at war with anybody who could possibly be harboring terrorists and freeing people who haven't indicated that they want freeing, why not Venezuela? "Take threats before they fully materialize, Ken"? There's certainly enough reason, using Iraq as the precedent.

Our government is such a bad, bad joke. In other countries, like Venezuela, everyone is well aware of the corruption so the government makes no attempts to hide it. But here it's lies upon lies upon lies to shield and confuse the ignorant into complacency. They need to just come out with it. The corruption runs deep enough now. It's not like they'll be held accountable or anything...

In more personal news, I am getting worse with the blood pressure going all over the place. It gets too high instead now. I turned all pink yesterday and I was all hot and my head felt full (of blood). Mom keeps saying "I dunno, kid... somebody put you together wrong," whenever I start feeling bad. So I've asked the logical question, the answer to which was no, she doesn't suggest a factory recall.

nebulablue @ 2006-09-02T17:16:00

2006-09-03T03:05:39Z

Climate change is a big problem, not for the future, but for the present. Here's some stuff to do about it.

Chavez needs to be dealt with. He's definitely up to something. My Grandfather says there is an opposing candidate in the next election. "If it were a fair election, he'd win." But it's not. (Chavez bought the same voting machines used for the 2004 elections here.) We'll see if the man survives.

Walt Disney World fingerprints visitors. The article's author states much better than I could what I thought upon reading the first paragraph or two.

"Now that our national immune system has begun to attack us in a terrible anaphylactic spasm -- indiscriminate NSA wiretaps, meaningless TSA security theater, secret aviation rules and no-fly lists, "free speech zones," suspension of habeas corpus and all the rest -- it's absolutely irresponsible to gather this kind of information and leave it where the savage toddlers of the national security apparat might find it and wreak havoc with it."

If it were posted clearly what they're doing with the information, if they're sharing their data, etc, it might not be so disturbing, but since they're just fingerprinting people without any explanation first and there are people who submit, no questions asked... I don't know... it's just so wrong.

(Insert non-sequitor here.)

I spent a good deal of time yesterday looking through sites about travel to Japan, particularly budget travel. Since Colin is taking care of what we'll do in Korea while I'm visiting, I'll be dealing with our Japan visit. The best site I've seen about where to go and what to see is quirkyjapan. Japan-guide.com looks pretty decent as far as all other travel details go...plus they have a Lost in Translation page. (: That makes me happy.

Other than seeing Tokyo, I want to go to Kanazawa to see Kanazawa Castle and Kenrokuen Garden, Kisoji to see the "well-preserved" town and stay in a traditional Japanese inn, and at some point I'd like to see Kyoto (Otagi Nenbutsu looks cool). If there's time I'd like to see Awashima Jinja too.

Japan in Spring! Yay! Plum blossoms! Cherry blossoms! *happydance*

As far as accommodations go... love hotels all the way, baby! :p Seriously though, they're supposed to be cheapest. I guess during the day we can store our bags in lockers at the train station? I found a list of capsule hotels in Tokyo, as Colin is dying to stay in one, and few of them allow females. Harumph. Also, maybe we could stay at a hot spring resort and a temple, budget permitting.

Finding food in Japan might be problematic. McDonald's will have to do. (;

Any way I look at it, the trip will be expensive.

Ok. Bedtime for me. It's been a relatively long day.

nebulablue @ 2006-08-19T13:49:00

2006-08-19T17:56:10Z

My cousins are all over MySpace. It's kinda scary. ;p And they're starting to find me. *insert nervous chuckle here*

We are very different. And by that I mean, I am very different. I miss them a little sometimes though.

nebulablue @ 2006-08-18T21:50:00

2006-08-19T03:59:03Z

I like Yahoo's Week in Photos thing. Good idea. (Third picture in this week's bunch worries me.)

I've spent about 2 hours today transcribing and vaguely editing a story from my notebook that I started a few months ago. (I'm not done yet, but I got tired so I stopped.) I mentioned it here when I first wrote it. It needs a LOT of work, and right now it's stuck. No worries though. I'll be practicing writing with Colin, trading excersizes from that writing book I like so much. Hopefully that'll spur me to finish the story... not that it's any good, but I still want to see what I'll make of it, just for the hell of it.

And now a hugemongous ramble because I've been extraordinarily pensive this week.

Something I noticed this week was the smell of rain. Actually I noticed the lack of scent of rain here. I remembered the first time I realized that I knew what the smell of rain was even though I'd never really smelled it, and how that moment felt so profound. I was already into my 20s and at college. I had never even thought of rain as having a smell. There is no rain smell here. Nowadays the world is so full of stuff and other people that we can't experience something as simple as the smell of rain on a regular basis. There's car exhaust and burger places next to pizza places across from gas stations by laundromats, so all the smells mingle together and there's no way in hell our brains, through our unsophisticated noses, could specifically pick up on "this is what impending rain smells like" with all of that. I'm sure there was a time when everybody could step outside, sniff, and say "Aha. It's gonna rain." Now it's only people in less populated places who can do that. Less populated places are becoming rare too. I'm surprised more people don't suffer claustrophobia. I'm surprised more people don't snap and just scream and run around like mad because of the anxiety and constant sensory bombardment of overpopulation and supposed progress. I really couldn't live for too long in a big city. I certainly couldn't work in a cubicle.

It's funny, me saying that, considering I'm holed up in my room all the time now. My relief, as far as that goes, is walking Jack. Night walks are particularly helpful. I can stand there in the wet grass (it is perpetually wet in the summer) and look up at the stars and imagine the place I live is as it used to be: rural. There are fewer stars visible here than before because of the city lights that have been creeping closer and closer, which depresses me... but... it's still better to stargaze here than anywhere else in or near Miami (or anywhere else I've been for that matter, with the exception of on the cruise 3 or 4 years ago, when we were in the middle of the Caribbean Sea).

The other night I walked outside, looked up, and thought, "Look at it all. The whole universe is up there." And I felt less claustrophobic for awhile knowing that unimaginably vast expanse is just above my head all the time. The next night, however, I went out with Mom to Walgreens and it took less than 3 minutes to get to a strip mall across from neighborhoods with identical houses. The encroaching suburbs infuriated me all over againand the claustrophobia returned. While I don't want to be 200 miles from my nearest neighbor or 500 miles from a hospital, I don't want to live with lots of people on top of one another and bumper-to-bumper traffic at all hours and no backyards and nothing but buildings and asphalt and concrete for a landscape either. (My skin is crawling just thinking about it.) I don't want to have children or grandchildren who don't know what grass feels like or how to climb a tree, or have neighbors so damn close they can say "bless you" through the walls every time they sneeze. *sigh* So... where should I go live?

I don't know if I want to live in the US anymore either. Part of me knows that the more people with sense stay in the country, the more likely it is things will change for the better, but part of me thinks it's time to leave. Wait out the collapse somewhere else and come back for the rebuilding. It's called being cynical and tired. I know there are plenty worse places to live. I know I love what this country used to be very much. I know it would be hard to really feel at home in another country. But. The government is beyond corrupt. The media is worthless. The people who expose the fraudulence and corruption are discredited and/or ignored. If voting isn't even fair then why bother? If I can't even bother with voting what else CAN I do? This country has lost its joy and (relative) innocence for no good reason, and it is government-imposed joylessness. U.S. of A., you had a pretty good run, but it's time to follow the example of God's great flood. ("Etch-a-sketch end of the world," as Eddie Izzard put it.) Get rid of all the stuff that isn't working out and just keep a few things that made sense. First we drown the whole Bush administration (; , and the people who voted for him in 2004 (which wasn't really that many people) because seriously, we don't need them in the gene pool... and then we throw out the Patriot Acts and the new airport security nonsense that leads to frisking old ladies to see if they have shampoo consealed about their person... and we rewrite the bit about electoral college because obviously that doesn't work out as great as it used to...

It's occurred to me that the 60s saw a similar feeling come to light. "The government is crap, war is crap, things need to change," etc. What the 'young people' did about it was get wonked out on LSD and have love-ins and concerts and try to spread a weird brand of communism involving drugs and sex for all, making lots of people take notice and want change, one way or another. And then things DID change, some for better, some for worse. Instead of very misguided, but mostly well-meaning, hippies, what we have is overwhelming apathy. There's no massive movement by the teens and twenty-somethings toward anything because of the pervasive feeling that there's no point in bothering, it'll all be fucked up anyway. The assholes who run things will die off eventually and then whoever cares can do something useful. Right now we sit. We are Generation X. Our zeitgeist is cynicism. Things are wrong with that, but I wouldn't know where to begin solving them.

Bleh. After this week my brain is full of all kinds of stuff that isn't useful at all.

Except maybe the realization of what I'd really like to do with myself. I doubt I'll do it, as not a bit of it is practical, but I can, in some small way, use the information. Not sure how yet. I'm sure I'll figure it out. I don't want to look over my shoulder in a few years and see nothing but regrets behind me.

I also came to the conclusion that chronological age means absolutely nothing. The only reason people should pay any attention to it is as a relative gauge of how long you've got left to live, and even that's iffy. How healthy, physically and mentally, you are determines your age. It's what you accomplish that matters most, not when you got around to accomplishing it. (Now I could go all Dada at this point, yet again, and argue how futile it is trying to 'accomplish' anything, as no human 'accomplishment' means a damn thing just because it's all been for other humans, and humans are only a momentary nuisance to the planet... but I think I'll spare myself that headache.) By that standard, there are 65 year olds who seem to have more life in them than me. That's just sad. Anyway, I'm going to assume accomplishment is anything that furthers intellectual or spiritual evolution of the species, prolongs life or otherwise aids humanity in somehow putting off our inevitable self-destruction. (Perpetuation of the species is pretty much all we have for a purpose in this universe.)So yeah... 'charitable things', medicical advancements, some forms of technology, agriculture, contribution to the arts and humanities (because it makes thinking people think even more! if it's good anyway.), etc. You get the idea. (Note the lack of sports?)

It's probably a week or more back now that I sent Colin an e-mail including some longish thing about missing the feeling that God cares. (At least I think I left that in... mighta cut it.) I still want to do what I can to get that feeling back. I don't know what though. The church that had made me feel like "all will be right in the world as long as I have a good relationship with God" has changed and I no longer feel any connection there. I feel nothing like that anywhere and haven't for quite a long time. It's very empty. So there's got to be another way other than church... or drugs.... or whatever new agey thing is in vogue now.

*sigh* I've been thinking about something Jeni said to me on the phone some months ago about doing an art exhibit just to have done it. I've been thinking about dreams and nightmares and political climate all being rolled together into something useful as far as that. Putting creative ideas into practice is something I'm no good at though. Even my crafty endeavors are coming to nought under my new found aversion to doing absolutely anything other than sleep or find new ways to waste time. Useless, useless, useless... at least I've done some laundry.

I'm thirsty. I'm going to go get my useless self some juice.

nebulablue @ 2006-08-17T20:06:00

2006-08-18T00:10:33Z

Adrian is alright. He's staying at the hospital overnight again.

I'm trying to stay sane stuck here with just Dad. He's not in the house but he's outside with his car stereo blasting godawful "music" at the entire neighborhood. If it doesn't stop soon I'll go out and turn it off. I've done it before. Arrg! He's annoying/obnoxious without even being in the same room!

*sigh* I'm going to feed Max and then myself and then plop down in front of the TV and hope Dad leaves me alone.

Why people should listen to me, and other things

2006-08-17T03:27:57Z

My brother is in the hospital. Appendicitis. I'm kind of scared for him.

Last night Mom and I went out specifically to get Adrian some medicine for his tummy because it was hurting a lot and he had been throwing up. Mom told me what was wrong with him so I could help her pick the right stuff. (Because I apparently know more about yucky tummies than anyone else she knows. Sad eh? For me, not her.) I said "What if it's appendicitis?" And Mom said "Naaaah." So now... I had to rub it in. My thing all through teenagedom was "I think this, but whatever. Nobody ever listens to me. Just remember I said it." (and then when I was right people would get all mad. But I am still almost always right. As long as it's not about me. People just don't learn.(; ) So. When Mom told me that Dad called from the hospital and said that "they're gonna do an ultrasound anyway, but they're sure it's appendicitis", I said "Hmm? What was it I said last night? What was it? Uh... hmmm... ummm... appendiwhaty? Oh yes! See? Nobody ever listens to me. People should listen to me." I'm not a nice person. (I wouldn't have said it if she seemed really worried. Well... probably wouldn't have.)

Mom and I are deciding whether we should go see Adrian now or not. On one hand it'd probably be nice to see him before he gets operated on, especially considering it's his first operation, but at the same time we all hate those families where everyone and their mother shows up for no real reason and get in the way (Dad is one of those people), especially for something 'simple'. And Adrian (like me) hates a fuss. He'd appreciate the gesture, but then just as quickly wish we'd go away, I'm sure. So... dunno. We could just go, give him hugs and kisses, and leave. ? Mom's in the shower, so I guess we decide afterward if we're going.

Also, completely unrelated, just a little bit of news that pissed me off and I think should be shared: Bush-gestapo are in the Miami-Dade Police Force. A coworker of Mom's went to court today. Dunno what happened there. But the reason he had to go to court is what incensed me. He parked at the airport in a handicap space. He has a visible handicap parking permit. He also HAD an anti-Bush bumper sticker on his car. So the cop there gave him a ticket for some bullshit thing involving the handicap permit, TOOK THE ANTI-BUSH BUMPER STICKER OFF, and put a police pride type bumper sticker on instead!(!!!!!!!!!!!!) I would like to know what happened... i.e. whether that policeman still has his job. I doubt highly that it happened, since it would be fair, but I still have some ridiculous, naive, idealistic hope that the cop got the sack and a good kick in the pants. Not holding my breath. This is Miami after all. And if the cop was Cuban, so much less likely.

Oh yeah. I updated here earlier.

And this is a weird little eyeball/brain befuddler.

And. I love this song, again applicable to our times.

"Color sound
All around
Wingtip smile
Sees for miles

And it looks like we've made it once again
Yes it looks like we've made it once again

It's a very extraordinary scene
To those who don't understand
But what you have seen you must believe
If you can
If you can"

That clip is from the movie Head. A strange little movie, but I think I get it. Mostly. Maybe.

Also completely unrelated, I discovered that if I could do whatever I wanted and not starve, I'd have a radio show on some obscure station, a boutique of whatever I like, and sing in a cover band. Funny huh?

Anyway. That's enough of that. Back to the thumb-twiddling.